Ayannali Blog

Thoughts and ideas and poems and...whatever I chose

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Location: Connecticut, United States

Friday, June 24, 2005

Finally things are confirmed

I had not realized the sheer amount of people who would be travelling on a Sunday. I have seen flight busy, but this resembles a Friday night!

Out of the 5 flights we fly to London a day out of New York , there is not one that is not booked solid....it's nuts.

It would make more sense for the traffic to be ex UK not ex US. But I think Wimbilton is more then a week.

So I will be off for a week.

I have a doctor's appointment today...which is good :)

Tuesday, June 21, 2005

6 days and counting

I'm leaving Sunday for the UK again. This time only going to be gone a week. I hope.

I bribed my little sister in to watching my son for me. She's 18 home from college with no job, and as much of a little diva she can be, she does need a break sometimes. Watching my sister and my son interact is like watching siblings that are a few years apart. While she's 18, my son is turning 12. They are more like brother and sister then they would like to admit.

This turns me into this bizarre second mother type that is pushing being old and parental in my sister's eyes. But I still can be cool enough NOT to have to walk 20 paces behind her and her friends. Plus I think I am a bit more lenient then my mom. I actually tell my sister what looks good on her, as opposed to saying what I would like her to wear. (this is something I can't do with my son yet. I still only let him pick out 2 outfits per shopping expedition.)

So who thinks USD200 is a lot for having my sister watch my son for the week??

I think she wants more, but this ATM machine is putting the out of order sign out. :)

Friday, June 17, 2005

Busy Busy Busy week

Let's see today is the 17th of June - what have I accomplished since my last post?

Arranged to get a fit to fly letter from my doctor and delivered it to my new boss on Wednesday.

Went to the Passport Agency on Tuesday to expedite a passport because I am leaving on the 26th for training in the UK.
received my new passport on Wednesday evening.

Most importantly, on Thursday , went to my son's 5th grade "promotion" or moving up ceremony. I am such a proud Mom!!
My son, who's had problems with speech and his reading and his memory and ADD and all the things that you think would make him fail, Gave the opening speech to the ceremony, not only did he give it, he gave it with confidence and did NOT look at his notes once. My son memorized his speech!! He never faltered while he spoke to a crowd of over 100 hundred people.

And yes I DID take pictures.

I am so proud of my son. And he looked so handsome in his pink shirt and tie ( I picked out the tie, I LOVE shopping for ties for him :) )

Some of my family came up, my aunt and my cousin with her little boy. My mom was there and my little sister showed up as well.

so what's on tap for me today?

I have to go to the pediatrician's office to pick up his medical form to complete registration for his middle school. Make a copy of said medical form to attach it to the summer program application and turn that in. Take my vitamins so that when I arrive at work I can grab a bite to eat and then work till 9 pm and wait for my bus that will get me home about 10:30 pm.

can't wait for tomorrow, laundry day!

Thursday, June 09, 2005

It is now official

I am pregnant. I am due sometime in December. Am I excited about it? In certain ways yes, but I would say I am more scared then anything else.

I am a 31 year old single mother, I have a son who is turning 12 in July and I don't own anything. No car, no house, nothing - Currently living with my mom partly because of my mother's medical condition and partly because of the cost to have an apartment on my own.

I am scared because now I have to come to the reality that I may not be able to care for the child.

You may wonder if I told the father, yes, he knows and is now in the process of speaking to a lawyer to find out all his rights. Is this a bad thing? No, not at all..I was scared he wouldn't care.
The biggest rub in that is, he lives in the UK.
So if he does take the baby, then I may never see him/her again, or it would be very difficult.

So there it is, the short version of what is sure to be a complicated few months....Years even.

I am also in the process of contacting a Family lawyer. I need to know all my options and know what my rights are.

Monday, June 06, 2005

well tomorrow's my doctor's appointment

And of course I had to choose an early morning appointment, not remembering that I was scheduled to work late on Tuesday. working late means not going in early and not needed to be AT the office at 7:45 am...

I mean sheesh, how do people function at that time?

Anyway, I have hope that this appointment will help with me feeling tired all the time and basic aches all over.

Maybe I'll even start sleeping better, can't sleep on my stomach right now.
Speaking of sleep, I have been having some very strange dreams of late. I know they say dreams are a way of your subconcious to work out your problems, but they can be very disturbing if you remember them.
In this case, I had a dream the other night where I don't quite remember it as say images, but feelings. Feelings of deep and desperate longing and stinging isolation.
For the first time in years I woke up crying. Not just crying, sobbing like someone had taken everything dear to me away.
This scared me, to my very core - what scares me more is that, I have no clue what I dreamt.


Thursday, June 02, 2005

This month is full of News!

I just found out my son got accepted to a Charter Middle School. I am really excited about this as the school is small enough to really give individual attention. What impressed me most about the school is the fact that they have family counselors, and that these counselors meet weekly to make sure that every thing is going well with each student.

Also while there is discipline, there is no out of school suspensions. If the child behaves that badly, they are seperated, but stay in school to finish any work that needs to be done. Also they have after school care, and homework help.

They ask the parents to do 30 hours of community service a year and to attend the weekly meetings, so the whole family is involved in the child's education.

I think my son will do well there, even if he hates the idea of uniforms